When Dating , there are certain things you should and should not do, for safety reasons of course.
Start Slow; Begin by only talking via email, find out about the person, and if anything seems to be “iffy”, trust your instincts and back away. Sometimes people on the internet like to “pretend” that they are other people, or act differently than who they really are. Watch for odd behavior, if your instincts tell you that something isn’t right, listen to them and walk away.
Keep your private information to yourself; Never include your last name, email address, phone number, place of work or any other private information on a free profile or in messages. Keep this to yourself, if anyone tries to pressure you into revealing private information, stop talking to them. This is one way that Identity Thief’s can come in and use the personal information that you have given them.
Request a photo; Seeing a photo of a person can be a hint as to what the person is like, plus you will get to see exactly who you are talking to. If they keep coming up with excuses as to why they don’t have a photo, move on.
Meeting; You are never obligated to meet anyone from the online world, if you feel the time is right for you to meet a person then do so. Only meet if you are comfortable with it, and only do so after you know a lot about the person. Being that it is Online Dating, you can gradually find things about the person and this gives you the chance to progress with the relationship at your own pace. Meet in a safe place, and always tell someone(friend, family member) where you are going. This way, if anything bad happens people will know where you are. Leave the name of the person and telephone number with them, also provide your own transportation and meet in a public place. When the night is over, thank your date and say goodnight, then leave in your own vehicle.
Watch for personality traits and warning signs; Watch for any displays of anger, intense frustration, or attempts to control/manipulate you. Acting in an aggressive manner, making disrespectful/demeaning comments, or any physically inappropriate behavior are all things to watch out for. Other things that could be entered here, include; Provides inconsistent information such as; Age, interests, appearance, marital status, employment, etc. Refuses to communicate on the phone after establishing a long term Online relationship. Never answers direct questions with direct answers. Appears differently in person than his online persona. Never introduces you to family, friends, co workers, etc.
Never do anything uncomfortable; If you are uncomfortable with the situation, don’t do it. Never do anything that goes against your gut instinct, as that usually indicates that something is wrong. Get up and leave if you have to, there is no obligation to the date and you can leave on your own whim.
Chatting on the phone; Never give out your home number. Use a cell phone and take measures to prevent them from viewing your number with caller ID. Many phone services offer caller ID protection. If you have to, use a public phone just to be safe.
Be safe when visiting out of town; If you are leaving the safety of your own town/state, then be extra cautious in the new area. Book your own hotel and don’t give out the information as to where you are staying. Arrange a rental car for transportation, so you can leave whenever needed.
Be cautious; Never act prematurely, act with common sense. Do not fall in love within the first week of talking to someone, take time and keep your emotions on hold until the right time comes. Do not have any intimacy(whether online or physical) until you are ready. If you do step across that threshold, be careful and use protection. If you must, the US Center of Disease Control and Prevention will have all of the info that you need about STD’s and how to keep you in full health. Always use protection(Condoms), I don’t mean to sound like your parent but if you must have sex, please do so in a safe manner.
Spammers; Some people use Online Dating services to get your email address, once they have that email address they can flood your email with hundreds of messages a day. To protect yourself from this, only use the Dating services anonymous email service, most Online Dating services offer this. Most spammers will still try to get through to your real email, they will send you emails(to the dating services email) saying for you to email them back at such and such address because they can only use regular email, Don’t fall for this. They will probably email an attractive photo as well, never give out your email address unless if you feel 100% comfortable with the person and only after you have talked to them for a while.
Consider a background check; There is absolutely nothing wrong with doing a background check on the person you are dating. For a small price, and if you have enough info on the person, you can do a background check to find out if he has a clean record or not. You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, but it is one thing I would do instantly.
Overseas Financial Scams; So you sign onto the Dating Service and you meet this really nice foreign lady. You two talk for a while, a month or so goes by. When she thinks you may be falling in love with her, she asks if you could wire her money. The reasons are varied, usually a sick relative or they need a plane ticket to come see you. Once you wire them the money, poof! She vanished! You will never hear from her again. If you are asked to wire money, be very wary and use your gut instinct. If you feel that something isn’t right, tell them that you can’t do it. Learn your countries laws regarding foreigners coming into your country, most of the time the person wouldn’t be able to come into your country you have traveled there and helped them obtain a visitors visa. Learning your countries laws will also help identify scammers, check blacklists that identify many scams/scammers.
